I write on this blog, my feelings, my observation, my experience and it truely reflects me. Today I am posting an essay, written by my Nephew and I am proud to be his mama.
PERSONAL ESSAY How it is that one can be influenced by somebody so much, despite the fact that they barely get to see or speak with each other? Is it possible to have someone across the world, someone you don’t see on a daily basis, be your source of inspiration? Yes, it most certainly is possible. My grandfather, Birendra Nath Das is easily one of my greatest influences in life. He has a demeanor that shows off his determination, integrity, and persistence in his every action. I can never get past the fact that at the age he is now, he is still charismatic and omniscient as ever. He has gone through many hardships in his life, and though that may be a very cliché statement, it has much more ground than normal because of the fact that my grandfather was born and brought up in the toughest times of India’s early independence. Though I do not get to see him often, I still feel that he has had the greatest impact on my life, and me as a person. My grandfather’s childhood was not one filled with easy successes or support. He struggled hard to achieve what he wanted, and he had to do it without much parental support. From childhood till today, I have always been showered with support from my family, especially my parents. Every task I partake in, my parents urge me to put in my best effort and they are always behind me. They support any decision I make and guide me when they feel that the decision is not in my best interest. My grandfather did not have that luxury. When he was growing up, despite the fact that he was a good student and wanted to become a doctor, his family thought that it would be better for him as well as the family if he joined the family business. He wanted to pursue a higher education, as I do now, so he could become a very successful man in the future; one who would be able to support his family with ease with a college education. Though his intentions were honorable and justified, his parents did not support their son’s decision to “abandon” the family to pursue his dream. He loved his family and did what they wanted him to do at a tender age of fourteen. However, that did not deter him from his goal. Though he had to stop going to school and could not pursue an education to become a doctor, with the support he got from his friends, along with his unyielding determination, he was able to keep learning from them and eventually he established a very successful business. This aspect of my grandfather’s life really influenced the way I look at life. I realized that if my grandfather, with no support from his family, could be such a success story, I can do wonders and maybe live my grandfather’s dream of becoming a doctor by doing what my grandfather did, hard work, being persistent, and being determined. I keep that in mind whatever I do in life. There was one time in my junior year, when I was participating in an USTA tennis tournament. It was the semi-finals, and I was facing the number two seed. Being an unranked player in that specific tournament, I knew that my odds of winning were not in my favor. However, before I realized it, I was the unlikely winner of the first set, 6-4. With that safely under my belt and a new surge of confidence, I started giving everything that I had. Unfortunately, the fact that my opponent was a more experienced and technically skilled player finally kicked in, and he was up in the second set, 5-1. He just needed another game to take the set. He would not win the match though, as he needed another set to put me away, but I knew that I would be too stressed and pressurized to play well in the third set. During the water break I just closed my eyes and my grandfather’s face flashed in front of me. At that moment, I remembered how, even in the face of hardship, he triumphed. Suddenly my new goal wasn’t “play not to lose,” but “play to win.” I fought back with everything I had. I hit careful shots, power shots, and even was able to throw in a couple of fancy shots. In the end, I had the number two seed frustrated beyond belief. After an extra 45 minutes, I was able to prevail. I mounted on my comeback, and I won the second set at 7-5. I would not have been able to achieve what I did that day if I hadn’t remembered my grandfather, and his never-ending determination in life. Everyone has their own personal and moral values. My grandfather has always valued honesty, integrity and trust. By profession my grandfather is a jeweler. In his profession, it is very easy to manipulate consumers by charging them too much for inferior quality products, as it is very difficult to make out any difference between good and bad quality jewelry unless a person has some knowledge about precious metals, gems and stones. It is very common amongst jewelers to make quick money by exploiting their customers who put their trust in the jewelers’ hands. My grandfather’s business was not like those other businesses. Though he was aware that he could make tons of money by taking advantage of the ignorance and trust of his customers, his integrity and moral values prevented him from doing so. He wanted to earn an honest living. His aim was not to earn quick money but to earn goodwill. He felt that cheating his customers for his own personal betterment would not help his mental state; he knew that he would forever be living in guilt if he had done so. The thing I respect about my grandfather is that his honesty and truthfulness was not just limited to his job; throughout his life, and even today, my grandfather still retains that mindset. He still practices that integrity, in every aspect of his life. I hope I can live up to the expectation that my grandfather has on me when it comes to honesty and integrity. I try very hard to walk on his path and have realized in my short journey of life that it is not an easy task to be truthful and honest in all spheres of life. Very recently, I was on the verge of losing a friendship with one of my close friends, whom I had known for ten years, because I chose to stand up to her and tell her that she was wrong in accusing another friend of doing something that he didn’t do. All my friends were surprised at my stand and told me not to bother because they felt that it was not worth to lose a friendship so strong over something negligible, but at the time I felt that someone had to make her realize the mistake that she was making. I felt that I had lost one of my best friends after the confrontation, but I was wrong. She apologized and thanked me for being a real friend who helped her do the right thing by accepting her mistake. Five years ago, my family went through a very frightening period of time. I was visiting my grandparents in India along with my parents. One day I woke up in the morning and was shocked to hear that my grandfather had a massive stroke and was admitted to the hospital and was supposed to have a triple bypass surgery. The fact that my grandfather, my invincible grandfather, was lying helpless in the hospital was impossible to accept. Being at the age that he was, I was scared for his life. But I was shocked to see his mental strength. Never once did his fortitude waver during that long illness. Though he was in pain, my grandfather never lost focus of what he needed to do to recover; he stayed strong throughout the ordeal, for himself, and for his family. This show of courage, not bravado, shot up my respect for my grandfather. Upon his recovery from his surgery, which left his leg heavily scarred and weak, he was not able to walk without some sort of support. Because of that, he would not really have much choice but to lay in bed for most of the day; that never stopped him from trying to recover faster, though. Every day, my grandfather would try to walk around the house, slowly, but surely. If he felt any pain while walking, he would not show it; he would just keep going until he reached his destination, and back again. My grandfather taught me another reality of life. One should not let hardships in life push you down. Only tackling the problem head-on, with ongoing persistence, will help you recover and go beyond. After witnessing my grandfather’s painful experience, I looked within myself and wondered if I had the mental toughness to experience something as intense as he did without any complains and had the determination to beat the odds. Sure enough, God gave me a chance to figure that out. I was in my freshman year in high school. During spring break, halfway through my tennis season, I was playing basketball at my house with a bunch of friends. We were all having a good time, when all of a sudden, I twisted my ankle. I was in immense pain. I was rushed to the emergency room and the doctor told me that I had a severe sprain and that the ligament was badly torn. I was told that I wouldn’t be able to play tennis for the next five to six months. I was devastated. Being one of the top players in my school team, I worried for my team. But then, I remembered my grandfather, and how he dealt with his surgery. I told myself that even though I could not play, I will not let the sprain get the best of me. Even with my large foot cast, I was never absent from the tennis practices and matches. Though I couldn’t play any games, I would stand on the side, and practice my serves, to the best of my ability, and helped my other teammates with their game. I was persistent in my actions, and I would not let an injury slow me down. Because of this, my coaches used me as an example; the player who could not play, but would practice consistently as if he could. My grandfather, though he lives so far away, has significantly affected me. His undying integrity, determination, and persistence, which helped him live a successful life, has influenced me to live my life in a similar fashion and that is how I want to see myself when I reach his age.
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